Sunday, March 9, 2008

Peace of Mind

I over plan everything. I rarely am able to enjoy a movie or even a live show without thinking or planning what I am going to do afterwards and how I can use my time more efficiently to better maximize my effort. I have tried recently to let go of these things and to enjoy things in the moment, but it's something that I really struggle with.

It is hard for me to be content in the moment without worry about what is going to happen in the next hour, week, month, or year.

This morning at the Quaker meeting I reflected on life and my current circumstances. I thought about David and I and my friends. I thought about the future and the upcoming news about Grad school and what my/ our future holds. And then I let it go. And I realized how happy, and content I was at that very moment. I thought about how I had a lovely weekend with lovely company and how life doesn't always really have to be as complicated as I make it out to be. I felt a little bit guilty about thinking so simply about my life and feeling content in very simple things, but I also felt really good. And feeling good and letting go of making plans for an hour made everything seem like it would eventually just fall into place and work out for the best.

Tomorrow I will probably start making plans again. But I think I will try to make them less, enjoy the moment, and be content in the simple things.

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